How To Win Ex Back Through Logical Thinking & Rational Behaviour, NOT Emotional Outbursts & Desperate Actions

Archive for the ‘General Tips’ Category


Win Ex Back Without Playing Head Games

Feb 17, 2009 Author: May | Filed under: General Tips

It seems there are as many different schools of thought about how to win ex back. A lot of these are focused on playing various kinds of head games with your ex; but even if these techniques manage to get ex back, it will be on a dishonest foundation, which will not be likely to lead to a lasting reunion. If you are wondering if your ex still wants you back, then this article will show you how to win an ex back without playing games.

get my ex back

Image credit: Gaetan Lee

While the two of you were still an item, she’d call or text you many times a day. Now your phone doesn’t ring so much. While there is a genuine risk of overdoing it, you may want to call your ex once a week (or two weeks), just to keep the lines of communication open and make a reconciliation more likely.

When should you call your ex? Call them on important occasions (their birthday, for instance). Sending along a card may also help you to win your ex boyfriend back or your girlfriend back.

Email is another good way to keep in contact. Remember not to overdo it here either. You can forward news stories your ex may enjoy, or make a point of adding your ex to the list of people you regularly send email to, whether this is personal updates, news or anything else. Just keep them on the list – you may get a response from your ex. Or maybe your ex will realise that she wants to meet up with you again. Who kows?

You have to make the call about whether or not to see other people while you are trying to get your ex girlfriend back or your ex boyfriend. If you’re really focused on the idea that you want to win ex back, this may not be a good idea – at the very least, don’t sleep with someone else. While the conventional wisdom is that you should date in order to make your ex jealous, this can easily backfire on you and is best avoided.

However, don’t let jealousy get the best of you if you get word that your ex is dating other people. Keep in mind that you two are broken up at the moment and this is not cheating. You can even gain some valuable information this way – look at the qualities that your ex is going for in their new dates. You may want to consider enhancing your appearance in order to win your ex’s heart back.

If you think that your relationship with your ex may have ended because you failed to hold things up n the romance department, having become complacent, then they’re probably looking for people who will sweep them off of their feet to date. If you find your ex is dating artists (and you’re more the football and six pack type yourself), then you may need to display a sensitive side in order to win ex back.

Consider the personality traits of your ex and look at what they really want and need in a mate. Try to step back from our emotions and look objectively at your ex’s actions and the things they say (and even more importantly, what they do not say). This can help you learn how to get back with your ex and give them all of the things they are looking for in a partner.

It’s important to keep your cool, no matter how you may feel on the inside. Don’t spill everything to your ex – you will be shifting the power dynamic to their side by doing this. By telling your ex that they are the one person who you must have, you are giving them all of the power over the situation. When you hold back, you are keeping the playing field level and making a healthy balanced relationship more likely should you be able to win ex back.

Most importantly, take time to work on yourself while you are broken up. Make sure that you look good by keeping up a workout routine, get a new haircut and some new clothes. Devote some time to self improvement; this will make you a more attractive prospect to your ex.

You have choices – you can either try to regain the affections of your ex by playing mind games with them or you can make a better choice. The best thing to do is to work on the problems which led to the demise of your relationship in the first place – this will help to build a healthier relationship with your ex if you can win ex back.

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In my previous article, I wrote that how small things can make a big impact on your loved ones in my article on how to make a woman feel appreciated. Here’s my story that supports that article. Don’t worry, it’s a short one.

 Improve your love life

Image by: tanakawho

My husband, Tommy knows that I write for this blog. He’s a big Star Wars geek. But he knows my passion for blogging and knows how I want to help people get back together with their ex. I’m not claiming to be a relationship expert here but between my husband and I, I’m the relationship expert. Hehehe sorry hubby.

Anyway, yesterday, he wrote me an email and in it, he included an article that he wrote for me and wanted me to include it on my blog if I find it useful. I’d include it, no matter how good or bad it is.

How sweet of him. I was so surprised. This was so unexpected. I think what he wrote was funny. I wonder how long it took him to write that article. No wonder last weekend he was watching Star Wars starting from Episode 1 to 6. That little bugger was doing a research for that article. See, how little thing like that makes me love him more.

Since he knows that I blog about get ex back, and since he’s a Star Wars geek, he wrote me an article on how to get your ex back by using Jedi mind tricks. I think that was very creative of him. I’ll include the article he sent to me tomorrow so that you too can read it.

That’s the end of the story.

So, what did we learn from this?

It’s nice to receive expensive gifts from your partner but sometimes simple things worth more than the expensive things.

Like my story above, my husband went all out to write me an article on how to get ex back by also adding what he loves in the article. He even did a research for it. I would never ever in a million years thought about writing an ex back article with Star Wars theme in it. Who’s the relationship expert now huh?

The effort that he took means a lot to me. What you need to do today is think of the little things you can do today that could create a big impact on your partner. You’ll see how those little things can spark your love for one another better.

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How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

Jan 19, 2009 Author: May | Filed under: General Tips

Toxic Relationships

Image by:  Boy27wonder

Sometimes a relationship can be toxic. How can you tell if you’re in a toxic relationship? What is toxic relationship definition? Answer these questions truthfully to know some of the toxic relationship signs.

-    Does your partner talk badly about you or put you down in front of other people?

-    Does your partner say they love you, but act otherwise?

-    Does your partner read your email or appear at places just to check up on you?

-    Does your partner make you dependent on them till you feel like you cannot live without their constant help?

-    Have you made any changes to your dressing, your mannerisms, your actions and thoughts just to please your partner?

-    Has your partner emotionally or physically harmed you in any way?

There are certain stages in a toxic relationship. It’s a cycle which never ends. First there is the honeymoon stage, then the blow, and followed by the reconciliation. It starts all over again and goes on endlessly until one partner decides to change things.

The first time you go out with your partner, you are in the honeymoon stage where all is well and good. When the blow comes, typically, you will be too far into the relationship to realise that the relationship is toxic. At that time, you will find it more difficult to pull yourself out. Then comes the reconciliation, where your partner promises that things will change. For a little while things do go back to being the honeymoon stage, but before you know it, the cycle starts all over again.

How can you get out of a toxic relationship? First, know that you do have choices and you can change things around. Next, realise that you need to stand up for yourself. In many cases, you may have been conditioned to think that it is entirely your fault. Be firm and realise that it is not your fault. You have a right to be in a healthy relationship.

The good news is that you can get out of a harmful toxic relationship. To end a toxic relationship, some people find counselling beneficial. Others find therapy groups are the answer to repair their relationship. What you need to realise is that to change things, both partners need to make an attempt at saving their relationship.

When push comes to shove, you must remember that you must be able to walk away from the relationship if things don’t work out. If you cannot walk away, you cannot heal. And once you have made the decision that you can walk away, you can begin to assert your needs in that relationship.

The vital thing to remember is that a happy healthy relationship comes when both partners are committed and willing to make it work. Your happiness lies in your hands.

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How to tell if your ex still wants you back?

Jan 9, 2009 Author: May | Filed under: General Tips
It’s natural to miss your ex after you had that horrible break up. It’s comforting to know that you’re not the only one having this feeling as it happens to everyone in this world who has ever experienced a break up or two in his/ her life before. But it’s also comforting to know that some couples are getting back together with their ex this very minute.
 
Through my experience and observation, most break-up couples want to get back with their partners the minute they call it quits. If only there were signs to tell you that your ex still wants you back. And lucky for you, I’m about to show you the signs that can tell you if your ex still wants you back or not.

Your ex still wants you if:

1. Your ex makes you jealous by somehow letting you know that they’ve found someone new. This could be by telling your best friend or someone you know, or by accidentally bumping into you with their new partner (refer below). This is a psychological game they play just to make you jealous. Note - This could mean two things. They want to let you know that they want you back by making you jealous, OR they have moved on.

2. You keep bumping into your ex at the usual spots where you two used to go out when you were together. In some cases, near where you work. In this case they would pretend to bump into you by mistake. What they really want to do is to check up on you and guess what, they probably miss you. They just need to get a glimpse of you any way they can just to make their day.

3. Your ex plays 007 with you. They go through all means possible just to get a glimpse of what is happening in your life. If they are spying on you like this, I guarantee that your ex still wants you back. If this is what you are facing, you may want to give your ex a chance.

4. Your ex still calls you even if they keep quiet when you answer the call. They probably miss you and want to hear your voice again.

Of course, if your ex doesn’t show these signs it doesn’t mean that they don’t want you back. Some may not show any signs, but deep down they still hope that you guys can get back together again. Only you know this, because you are the only one who knows your ex best. Then again you can find other advice in this blog that could help you to save your relationship.

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Relationship Quotes To End The Year of 2008

Dec 31, 2008 Author: May | Filed under: General Tips
I’ve been away lately and didn’t even get a chance to access the Internet. That’s the reason why you haven’t heard from me for quite a while. I would like to apologize for that. Anywya, I think it’s appropriate for me to end the year by presenting you some of the relationship inspirational quotes that might inspire you further. I’ll start with my own quote first and followed by the rest.

"Winning ex back is through logical thinking and rational behaviour, not emotional outbursts and desperate action" - May Lehmann. (wink, wink)

"Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down."
-Oprah Winfrey

"Well, it seems to me that the best relationships - the ones that last - are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is… suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with" ~ Gillian Anderson

"It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations." – Kahlin Gibran

"Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." – Aristotle

"Where does the family start? It starts with a young man falling in love with a girl - no superior alternative has yet been found." – Winston Churchill

"The act of forgiveness is the act of returning to present time. And that’s why when one has become a forgiving person, and has managed to let go of the past, what they’ve really done is they’ve shifted their relationship with time." – Caroline Myss

"Man is a knot into which relationships are tied." ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"Once the trust goes out of a relationship, it’s really no fun lying to ‘em anymore." -Norm from Cheers

"Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take." -Anthony Robbins

"The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart." – Helen Keller

"Love doesn’t just sit there like a stone; it has to be made - like bread, remade all the time, made new." – Ursula LeGuin

"Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same." -Flavia Weedn

"You can’t stop loving or wanting to love because when it’s right, it’s the best thing in the world. When you’re in a relationship and it’s good, even if nothing else in your life is right, you feel like your whole world is complete." ~ Keith Sweat

"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." – Mark Twain

"To love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person." – Eric Fromm

"Our greatest joy-and our greatest pain comes in our relationships with others." ~ Stephen R. Covey

I hope that the collection of good relationship quotes above will inspire you to improve your relationship for the better. If you have your own quotes about relationships, or by other people that are not listed above, please do not hesitate to share with us all.

 
If getting your ex back is what you are aiming at, then, stay with me. Next year we will be covering more on this topic.

So, happy new year to all of you and hopefully 2009 will be the year that you’ll win your love back.

Happy holidays and cheers!

May Lehmann.

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